Random tangent on the 'L' word

“Relationships-of all kinds-are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold onto some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost.”

This right here is why things fall apart. FEAR. We feel our grip begin to slip so we hold on tighter which in turn usually leads the the tension growth the the so believed 'one' to suddenly push away. To turn in to a stranger. We've all been fooled. Our ignorance is not our fault. Love movies through the centuries have made us smile upon and believe the idea that when love forms, it's over days, not years. And when we decide to share our feelings, the object of our infatuation suddenly breaks down and says they feel the same and it always ends happily ever after. But I've never seen that happen. Have you? As soon as the 'L' word pops into existance, bags are packed. It's 'all going too fast.' Or it sticks for a few weeks with a weak definition. A false identity. Do you even know what 'love' means when you use it? Few these days do. Love doesn't mean that I really really like you. Love means I'm here for you and I'm not going anywhere. Love means that your happiness is essential to my own. Love means that without you, I am lost and I'd rather die in this moment than hurt you or live without you in my life. Love means that you are the only one who makes me feel this way and no one else is worth losing this. And I'm referring to all loves. Yes, a little more direct towards romantic relationships but these definitions remain true through all situations. Growing up is learning to think and use your words wisely. To be smarter than to through aroung emotions like saturday football. Realize that a relationship is made of two. That every decision, every word, every action now effects two bodies. Love is built on trust, and trust comes from vulnerablilty. Love means you have the power to tear my whole world to pieces, but I'm trusting you not to. In a relationship, there has to be space. Time do your own thing. Time to be independent because you cannot be dependent on the other person. You have to let each other know that it's okay to spend time with other people on your own because I know that you'll come back to me. I know you won't do anything to disrespect me. It's a big decision, a big responsibility, and a big struggle but nothing good comes from suffucating one another. Love is making two lives fit into one, but it's still two different people. So before you decide to vocalize this word and before you run from or to it from the lips of another you need one more word. Respect. Be gentle. Be understanding. Be selfless. And most important of all, be mature.